I was chased for a job once. They kept asking me to apply, but I really wasn\u2019t sure if it was the right move for me. But they persisted and in the end the flattery got the better of me. So, I went for it \u2013 full steam, because that\u2019s the only way I know. And then the strange signals started. Yes, they wanted me, but I\u2019d need to be on probation. Yes, I was a great fit, but the promises made began to fall away. Overall if left a bad taste in my mouth. What was this all about? Suffice to say, the job didn\u2019t work out well in the end. And unfortunately, it was a long road that left me pretty wrung out.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Looking back on it now, I marvel at how I missed the signs that all was not right. At how often I blamed myself for not meeting expectations or knowing how to make it work. \u00a0The dissonance was there from the start \u2013 being invited in and then rejected every day in small (and sometimes big) ways. I recognise it now as a type of group dysfunction \u2013 the ties that keep an existing group together also makes it hard for it to evolve and allow new people in. Without explicit work, they were not capable of really accepting me, even if they said that\u2019s what they wanted to do. That would involve some kind of breaking in order to re-build and that was too scary.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
In an early training on Team Coaching, I read about the need to make sure that \u2018this is the team\u2019 before you start. The idea was that there\u2019s no point in spending hours on vision and ways of working if some people are about to leave or join. I understand this at one level, but my experience over the years has been that defining \u2018this is the team\u2019 is a fool\u2019s errand. Because change is constant. People come and go, willingly or not, the world changes and demands new configurations of the group. Life is messy and it gets in the way. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
So, what can we do to give our teams the chance of adaptation and survival?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\ud83d\udd70\ufe0f Acknowledge the past. To get ready to receive new people and really make the changes you say you want, it\u2019s important to name and honour what has gone before. Otherwise, those who are bridging the \u2018old\u2019 and \u2018new\u2019 team can feel torn or left somewhere in limbo. Talk about who has been and gone. Recognise what they gave the team and the journey that you have been on.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\ud83c\udfd7\ufe0fUnderstand the challenge. Explore the pressures that demand change in the team. Unpack what\u2019s driving the need for new and different perspectives. Align on why these matter \u2013 what\u2019s really at stake? – and make sense of the need to adapt and the contours of the new direction.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\ud83e\udd17 Create space. Allow breathing room for new joiners to understand what they are coming into and create opportunities for them to tell you what they see. Treat their fresh perspective as a gift \ud83c\udf81not a judgement, even if you disagree with some of it. Find ways to have open, courageous conversations about the new thing that you are creating together.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\ud83d\udc3e Take small steps. You don\u2019t have to be completely aligned straight away. In fact, if you are then you\u2019re probably not really changing much. (It should hurt a bit, like building new muscle). If you can\u2019t reach agreement on the shiny vision, just try to take small steps together, one at a time. That\u2019s usually the only way to get anywhere, anyway.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Sometimes I wish I could go back in time and call out what was happening in that old job. I could have saved myself a lot of pain. But being \u2018in\u2019 it means you often can\u2019t see it. If we\u2019d had a team coach we might have done better!<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
The team said they wanted new people and fresh perspectives, but really they wanted things to stay the same. <\/p>\n
The result? Pain and frustration all round.<\/p>\n
Some thoughts here on what gets in the way of teams opening up to meet new challenges and what can help. <\/p>","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":7497,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[36],"tags":[14,8,9],"class_list":["post-7496","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-blog","tag-change","tag-coaching","tag-leadership"],"yoast_head":"\n